Knowing

Usually when people ask me about how my life has been, I'd always joke and say "same shit, different day".  Not forgetting that I should probably add on and say "same joy, different day" too =) Well life's been good, nothing I couldn't handle, nothing really upsets me so immensely that I could not get back on my feet again.

So yesterday we went out to celebrate Ken's birthday and god knows why I said I wanted to bake a cake for his birthday. Man, I sure liked to talk big, considering the fact that I've never baked before haha. Thank goodness I still had some time after the submission of my assignment last week to do some study on the various vanilla cake recipes around the web, and down-listed a few of them and seek the advice of my neighbor which apparently is a seasoned bakery chef. Even checked on the recipe of whipped cream.

So here it is. Vanilla cake.

1 & 3/4 cups of self raising flour

1 & 1/2 cups of all purpose flour

1/4 tsp of salt

Since I couldn't find cake flour, so I had to sieve the self-raising flour four times to make it really powdery (credit go to a certain awesome green jumper cook from kiwi land by the name of Maurice). Sieved all purpose flour one time and mix well and set aside.

1 cup unsalted butter at room temperature

2 cups sugar

I had to wait for the butter to become a tad soft and melt a little due to the warm room temperature ( in which case the room temp is well below 15C because its cold here! ). I used a wooden spatula and pressed and mixed REALLY long, made sure all the sugar is integrated into the butter.

4 eggs at room temperature.

Add one at a time, beating after every addition. Yes, I beat pretty long ( also forgetting not to overbeat it ) after adding in every egg.

4 tsp vanilla extract

Just add it in. After which I used an electric mixer to blend it well before I put in the dry ingredients I set aside just now, alongside with a cup of undiluted evaporated milk. I think this is the important part because in addition to beating well after every addition of ingredients, its crucial to start and end with the dry ingredients. So just go by this

1/3 of the dry ingredients, to

1/2 cup of undiluted evaporated milk, to

1/3 of the dry ingredients, to

last 1/2 cup of the undiluted evaporated milk, to

last 1/3 of the dry ingredient

Beat well after every addition! Patience and love is the key to a successful cake! Mine looked like this before I greased the pan and put it into the oven.

Looked pretty awesome right! What a sigh of relief when I see the final texture of the dough to be like that. Then, grease the pan and put the mixture in. Oh, remember to preheat oven to...I couldn't remember what temperature but I just knew that I had to set the cake in 325F (or 160C ish ), and the oven were already well in 160C for a long time because someone else was baking. Wait for a GOOD long time, actually depending on your baking tray. Mine was really fat and tall so it took me easily a good one hour. Use a toothpick, or in my case a spaghetti (yes I did not have anything long and hard like a satay stick to test) to poke the cake. Cake's ready when the stick comes out dry. Let it cool for 10 minutes at least before taking it out.

I was actually rushing out for dinner with the rest of the people for the birthday boy, I had to take a later bus on my own because the cake wasn't ready! 15 minutes before my bus I took one last poke into the cake, and I remembered a lot of my hall mates were in the kitchen as well watching me, and boy, did my heart pound like a hammer when I pull the stick out (because I was going to be SO late for dinner), and when the last end of the stick came out of the cake and it appeared to be dry, everyone in the kitchen actually cheered "YES!". At least I think they were cheering for me haha. I took the baking tray, left it in my room and leave straight away for the bus. Poor cake didnt get any attention whatsoever from me.

I was really glad the cake was baked thoroughly! My first try, real luck I have here. Not boasting but it tasted really good haha, I couldn't stop eating it myself. Oh and there is the recipe for the whipped frosting on the cake.

3 egg whites

3/4 cup of sugar

Pinch of salt

1/3 cup of water

I set the glass bowl with all the above mentioned ingredients on a medium heated simmering water ( remember not to overheat it, or else you'll end up with sweet scramble eggs ). Just keep stirring until all the sugar has melted. Then comes the amazing part, this seemingly measly amount of ingredient, after medium speed beating with electric mixer, actually turns out like this.

Add in vanilla extract towards the end. Do not overbeat the whipped frosting, and beat it until stiff peak. Stick peak is the point where the whipped frosting is so viscous until it becomes a non-newtonian fluid and defies gravity. That is in engineering term haha. Well actually, stiff peak is the point where you set a knife in the cream, and topple it upside down (completely) and nothing moves, at least that's what my nice friend did to me in the kitchen. Note: the knife wasn't required really, I just want to boast how awesome my cream is.

Oh and after dinner JiaYean and I went back early, got the keys to our friend's house and decorate the cake (remember I said I left for the bus right after I took the cake out of the oven? ). We had to surprise our friend so to quote JY, she said "time is of the essence"! Here is how it went.

Glad everyone liked it, at least I know someone was hogging the top crust and finished majority of it, birthday boy took 3 slices of it, and only a slice of it is what's left of the entire cake towards the end of the feast. After which we played a game of Taboo which was really fun, more like the company was the best. Had tons of laughter which I believed was genuine from each and every person in the room. Had the best recognition and appreciation expressed from the birthday boy, which was both silly and heart warming at the same time haha.

I had a good time, and the responses I've got were REALLY worth all the effort, I did not feel a SLIGHTEST bit of drag. Thanks, to you, and to everyone else =)

the road ahead.

Well, a picture paints a thousand words. This is probably how I've been feeling for the past few days.

I've really just let down a huge luggage recently. I really couldn't talk to anybody for god's sake, I just want to stand there for a while more with my luggage. Take a look into the horizon in the distant. Catch a new breath. Take a look back at my luggage for one last time...

...so I can move on.

Thank you

You'd probably will never read this, but here it is - 

Thank you

For hearing me out, and still see me as who I am. I could finally breathe my life again after so long. Thank you, really.

Last weekend

Last friday night, yeah it resembles Katy Perry's song, we celebrated Tian Hui's birthday.

That was some fun and some good food we had there. Had tons of chips as well, something that I crave almost certainly at some point of time every week. Well, there's a good reason to why I exercise consistently every week without fail. So I won't have the slightest bit of guilt the next time I dig into that box of chips!

Last night, Saturday night was the party after the dinner. Had tons of alcohol, JDs, Vodkas and Cointreau. I've gotta admit that was a tad too much alcohol, and in spite of my numerous experience at heavy drinking, I got drunk the first time yesterday. I was always the high tipsy guy, until I got wasted yesterday and lied down on the floor for the whole night. There was of course much more story to it but it ain't gonna be disclosed here hehe. 

Was lucky to be wasted in the comfort of a friend's house and stayed over. Thank god they're bunch of nice chaps who doesn't mind a lot of things. Glad to have them. 

Well, to wrap things up I'd say yesterday was more like me letting my worst nightmare out loose, and not being able to hold all the long suppressed feelings in anymore. Meh, guess it was good to let it out?

Someone like you

So,

life's pretty much the same.

I went Mt Buller on the weekend with couple of my friends, and I finally managed to pull a skiing trip off. To be exact, we didn't ski in the end, we took up snowboarding instead. Boy, that was fun. Mount Buller really have some really nice long slopes for snow sports, and it was very exhilarating to snowboard at high speed. Provided the speed could last more than a minute, that'd be awesome. However I still managed to have a lot of fun and thrill nonetheless. 

Yesterday, Normanby House had an event. Its the party bus! Basically we boarded a bus with a dance floor and traveled down to the city and visited a bar, a club and a phail club/bar/pub which is the last place we've visited before heading back. Perhaps we were tired, and perhaps the place just blows. Had my first Tequila Shot. Interesting much, taking that pinch of salt, downing that shot and then biting into a lemon.

 

To be honest, both Mount Buller and Party Bus made me feel more like a foreigner, in a good way. Like seriously, Melbourne city is infested with asians, makes you really wondered where did all the Caucasians go. In Mt Buller, when we were having meals whatsoever we always seemed to be the ONLY bunch of asians around. Party Bus too were saturated with primarily Caucasians. Make no mistake I'm not complaining, its more like a "Australia, now that's what I'm talking about". 

Going off to a friend's house for potluck later. There's going to be around 15 of us. Talked to a friend of mines about this recently, like how fortunate I am thus far. Most of the things I've always wanted to do when I grow up were checked in my bucket list. Imagined myself going road trips, imagined myself drinking beer in a friend's house during winter etc. I hardly say this out loud, but here it is - Thank you God. 

...although there's still some issues here and there still left unresolved. Atop of everything wonderful happening, some issues still bore me down to my knees and left me really helpless. At least I still have what I call a "normal life" on the majority part of my life to keep those silent cries shut, and get a hang of myself. As much as I would want some things to change, some facts still remained the same. I did get some answers, but as much as a optimist and a problem-solver I am, I still wind up in the crossroad now, and questioned

What now?

what if

Don't hate me for this, I know its totally inappropriate and I swear I usually would never prompt this question in normal day to day speech, hell, I've never asked that thus far. Just curious, if under any unfortunate circumstance you were at the wrong place at the wrong time and got into an accident and was at the verge of dying - 

Can you still breathe your last breaths peacefully and cherished all that you've lived and leave with no regrets?

I wish I could. Maybe its the thought of that allowed me to be able to cherish my every waking moment. Maybe not every single one of it, at least the most of it?

Holiday's a really good time though, takes your mind off the materialistic in a good way. Had enough time to think thoroughly through things etc. 

( Digress. I got my first High Distinction grade this semester! Whilst everyone had four HDs every semester, I got my first after entering university. Doesn't change the fact that my average marks improved and I got my first HD which is such---a---delight! )

Unfortunately a friend amongst us still struggle with issues of friends and loneliness. I always seemed to be his last resort before he takes the final straw. Although in addition to couple more adversaries, I still think they are broke even with the age he is now. God did give me ample signs to reach out to this lost soul and give him a helping hand, but in all honesty I have no idea what to do either. Time and time again I have failed to send the message that "I couldn't help you if you don't help yourself" out across to him. All this sounded all too familiar anyways, and it's also not like I have not been through solitary before. Simply put it this way, if you could not handle solitary, it just simply goes to mean you dislike being with yourself. As much as I would want to help, sorry there is only so far I could go. I do not stand on firm solid grounds, I have issues of my own as well. 

In the midst of all the ruckus and talking I did also mention that we shouldn't all be too stubborn sometimes. Sometimes, some things are just not meant to be ours. After which I thought to myself again about what I said and was reminded by what you said. You said if we love someone, we shouldn't be cowardly and we should think about how we can give them better than what they have.

What if...

I really think I couldn't afford to give anything better? Isn't this the time for me to just back off? As much as I want it, and I want it so very dearly, and because I want it so dearly I could never fathom myself losing it even further. For this I will have to respectfully disagree with you. Sorry but this is really not mine's to take, and I choose to back off because it is never love to snatch, it is selfishness to rob something and have it turn to ash in your hands. 

Besides, it is foolish for me to dwell on issues out of my reach. I am still thankful for having friends which I could just hang out, like, really just hang out. There still beautiful things around other than the ones I truly cared for, if only I choose to take my eyes off for a while. Which I did, and I was glad.

( At Mt Dandenong, yesterday )

1km

unlocked a new perk today.

On the side note, I did manage to reach that target today. 40 laps was boring much. 

Holiday has pretty relaxing thus far, and boy, time sure flies by fast. Hadnt been doing much this holiday, which doesn't really bother because its what holiday is to me.

Watched Kung Fu Panda 2. Very good movie, and better than the first. Whereas for Transformer 3 : Dark of the Moon, I found it a tad disappointing after finishing the movie in the cinema. Don't exactly know why am I feeling disappointing after the movie though, but I sure know I was not thrilled. 

Went to city and visited one of the gardens as well in this winter.

(Behold, the Temple of Winds........right)

And as of recent we had my our favorite fish and chips in the city followed by a visit into Melbourne Museum. Guess what? Its free access for students. Awesome much.

That being said, I still have a lot of items on my to-do-list to complete, of which nearly more than half of them are official matters concerning my academic studies and internship. Phfffft. Nevertheless, this holiday has been pretty good to me =)

That's all, and this is Lester, logging out.